Cooking With a Muscular Fish Lady
by Strikingzebra
Summary: You decided to cook with Undyne today. While cooking though you realize something about the fish monster you didn't realize before. A gender neutral Reader X Undyne oneshot.
It was a lovely day in Waterfall. Water was flowing, Echo Flowers are echoing, Aaron was flexing. A lovely day indeed. You got off of the River Person's boat and made your way past Napstablook's house. Your destination was right around the corner. You turned the corner and saw a house that appeared to be in the shape of a fish with sharp teeth for it's door. You walked up to the door and gently knocked on it. You waited a few seconds and then the door opened with a thud. What you saw in front of you was the captain of the Royal Guard, Undyne.

"Hey there, Punk! Are you ready for our cooking lesson today!" She greeted you with her signature smile.

"Hi Undyne! You bet I'm ready for our cooking lesson!" you exclaimed, ready to have some fun. You know that Undyne isn't the best cook, but it's still so much fun to have these "cooking lessons" with her.

"I love that spirit, Punk! Come on in and we'll get started!" Undyne said as she stood aside and let you into her house. It looked almost completely new, as if the fire that happened the first time you were here never happened. She even managed to get some upgrades as well. She now has a more proper living room consisting of a sofa, and a television. However the broken window still remains from the time that Papyrus jumped through it though.

"Wow! I love what you did with the place!" You complimented her in regards to her redesigned house. You sat on the sofa and felt like you didn't want to get up due to how comfortable it is.

"Heh, all I did was move the sofa and T.V. in. You should thank Alphys for this, with her new invention and all," Undyne said modestly as she sat down on the sofa right next to you. "So what's been going on at the Skelebros house?" she asked.

"Oh nothing much really. Sans being lazy and punny as usual. However, I have noticed him starting to get a bit more active sense Toriel started coming out of the ruins. As for Papyrus… well, he has a date tonight!" You exclaimed excited for your friend going on his second date.

"HELL YEAH PAPYRUS!" Undyne shouted with joy as she rocked out of the sofa fist pumping the air. The little outburst startled you a bit but you regained your composure until you saw Undyne's scaly muscular arm. "So who's the lucky monster?" Undyne asked. When she heard no response she looked at you and saw that you were in your own little world of muscular fish arms. She nudged you a bit and you were awoken from your trance.

"Oh um… Muffet! Mettaton did come over last night and had a practice date with him. It was interesting, to say the least," you said, remembering the event from last night forming a small smile.

"Muffet huh? Not bad, Paps not bad." Undyne smiled, proud of her friend.

The two of you sat on the couch for a while discussing on current happenings, from Asgore trying to take Toriel on a date to Mettaton having Napstablook and Shyren performing on his show one night. After a while though Undyne stood up and stretched. "Well do you want to start that cooking lesson now Nerd?" she asked you.

You nodded and the two of you walked over to the kitchen. She got out some ingredients for today's recipe. "Today we will make an old classic. But first answer this riddle." Undyne took a deep breath and then bellowed "I SCREAM! YOU SCREAM! WE ALL SCREAM FOR...what?"

"ICE SCREAM!" you yelled in response, excited to hear what you two are making today.

"HELL YEAH NERD! LET'S GET THIS STARTED!" Undyne yelled as she took a pot and poured sugar, milk, and cream into it. "First, you want to stir this mixture on the stove until the worthless sugar dissolves! Here, you go first!" She handed you a wooden spoon and you started stirring. You stirred nice and gentle. After a while she took the wooden spoon from your hands. "Nice job {Y/N} but now let me handle this!" She rapidly stirred the mixture as it went flying everywhere. As you watched Undyne stir you again got distracted by her arm muscles. You started blushing slightly as you continued to watch her blue, muscular, scaly arms work.

Undyne looked inside the pot and saw the there was no sugar left. "Awesome, all the sugar is dead! Now we pour this stuff inside a large measuring cup that has some vanilla in it." You then snapped yourself out of your little daze and watch as she poured the mixture into the measuring cup rapidly with a lot of the mixture sploshing everywhere. "Now we have to let it chill for two hours… BUT I'M NOT WAITING THAT LONG FOR ICE CREAM!" Undyne pulled out some kind of ray gun from one of the drawers and fired what seemed like an ice beam at the measuring cup. Ice started to form on the outside of the cup as you saw the mixture become completely frozen.

"Now we pour the mixture into the ice cream maker and wait. Do you mind doing that?" You nod and took the cup and tried to pour it in. The mixture was stuck to the measuring cup. You struggled a bit to get it out by hitting the bottom of it and sticking a spatula inside it to try to scoop it out. After a while you were able to get it out. The mixture fell into the machine with a thud as it broke into several tiny pieces. "Now we just flip the switch and in 20 minutes we'll have ice cream! Is what I would say if I was on a cooking show. I know a faster way on how to make this faster! We'll set the settings so that it will stir rapidly, say about 1000 rotations per second, so that we only have to wait one minute!"

You knew this wasn't going to end well, yet you let her do her thing for it always amused you. She flipped the switch and you heard the rapid brrring of the machine. The two of you waited for the machine to be done. You looked at Undyne as she impatiently looked at the machine tapping her fingers on the countertop. You then gazed at her long flowing red hair which is usually in a ponytail. _'Man.' You thought to yourself. 'She sure does have beautiful hair. I wonder what kind of shampoo she uses.'_ Your thoughts were interrupted as you heard a sound. _BZZZT!_ That did not sound good. You looked at the machine and saw that it was rapidly shaking up and down while electricity pulsed through it. Then suddenly a whole bunch of smoke appeared from the machine as the little timer inside the machine beeped.

"Hell yeah! It's done! Let's see here." Undyne lifted the lid to the machine and got two bowls one for you and the other for herself. She took an ice cream scoop and scooped out some ice cream and put it in your bowl. The two of you sat down at the table in the kitchen. The ice cream was burned to a crisp. You didn't even knew that you could burn ice cream yet here it is all burned. She poured some chocolate syrup onto the ice cream. When she was done pouring it, it looked no different due to the color of the ice cream and syrup. She gave you the bowl and said. "Dig in {Y/N}!"

You hesitantly put your spoon in and took a scoop. The "charcoal" cream stayed on the spoon a bit as you held it next to your mouth. You looked over to Undyne and saw her chowing down on her bowl, seeming to enjoy it. You then took a bite of the charcoal cream. It had a weird combination of taste in that it tasted like burnt leaves yet it was cold. You then took another bite and then another until your bowl was empty. Somehow that was delicious! "Wow! That was amazing! We need to do this recipe again." you exclaimed. You then turned towards the ice cream machine and saw that it was smoking. It then bursted into flames. "We'll have to get a new ice cream machine of course."

Undyne got up from her chair, grabbed a fire extinguisher from the side of the fridge and used it on the fire. "There's no way I'm going to let my house catch up in flames again." Undyne said as she extinguished the fire. Once the fire was gone she put the extinguisher away and sat down on the couch. She motioned for you to come sit with so you did. When you sat down on the couch she asked. "Do you want to watch some anime?" You nodded you head yes and relaxed on the sofa. "Ok what are you in the mood to watch? I have Assault on Colossus, Scooter Sun, Half Plastic Sorcerer, One Kick Girl or Mew Mew Kissy Cutie."

You pondered in thought for a moment thinking about which anime to watch. Eventually you decided on an old classic. "Let's watch Mew Mew Kissy Cutie."

"Good choice. You can never go wrong with Mew Mew and her friends! Plus I won't have to get up since I watched some before you came over." Undyne pressed the button on the remote and soon enough the title sequence of the anime came on. The two of you sang the song together butchering the japanese lyrics. Then the show came on.

"OH! This is the episode where Mew Mew confesses her love too her senpai! I love this episode! It makes my shipping dreams come true!" Undyne enthusiastically said as she nerd out like Alphys usually does.

' _She's so cute when she nerds out,'_ you thought. _'Wait, what am I thinking! She's my friend. I shouldn't be thinking these things. But how can I not. She's so cool, strong, and beautiful. AAAGGGHHH!'_ You were so confused why you had these feelings for the captain of the Royal guard.

"{Y/N}? Are you ok? You're blushing really hard. Almost just like how Alphys does when you talk to her about her OTPs." She smiled trying to lighten the mood. You debated with yourself on rather you should be honest with yourself and tell her your feelings or if you should keep it inside and say nothing. "You can tell me you know. I'm your friend. Besides I'll find a way to get whatever's bothering you out. So you might as well tell me to save ourselves the trouble." Undyne said gently. It's a rare sight to see Undyne be so gentle but whenever she is you enjoy every moment of it.

You took a deep breath and readied yourself for what you're about to say. "Undyne there's something I've been meaning to tell you. I'm just not sure how to say it." You paused and saw Undyne intently listening. She motioned for you to continue. "Ok so… Undyne. I… um… is it getting hot in here or is it just me?"

"Just spit out, ya nerd."

"Ok. Undyne I have a…" Was all you were able to say before Undyne grabbed you by your shoulders and pulled you in closely. She placed her lips on yours in a warm embrace. You widened your eyes in shock but then slowly closed them leaning into the kiss. The taste of burnt ice cream was still on her lips. After a while the two of you separated and looked at each other eye to eye.

"You think I haven't noticed you looking at my muscles or my hair? It was very obvious that you have a crush on me. I felt like you would find some way to chicken out so I decided to show you my feelings right there. I love you {Y/N}," Undyne said as she wrapped her arm around you shoulders, bringing you in for a cuddle.

"I'm glad you decided to kiss me Undyne. I would have chickened out to be honest. I love you too, Undyne," you said as you leaned into Undyne and held hands while she snuggled you. The two of you continued to watch Mew Mew Kissy Cutie. When the scene where Mew Mew confessed her love came up the two of you were overcome with how cute the scene was.

When the episode was over, the two of you got up from the couch, and headed towards the door. "Well {Y/N}, I had a blast cooking with you. How about you come over tomorrow night and we can go out to get something to eat?" Undyne asked.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea! See you tomorrow then Undyne. Love you!" you said to Undyne was you started to exit out of the door.

But before you exited out of the door, Undyne stopped you, leaned down, and gave you a quick peck on your lips. "Love you too, ya nerd." You waved goodbye to Undyne as you left her house.


End file.
